If We Never Meet Again
by Ryssa1457
Summary: Jacen really shouldn't have shunned Anakin after his confession. It was just because he was scared. Anakin wasn't disgusting. Anakin was Anakin. And Jacen loved him for that. Jacen/Anakin, Incest, DON'T JUDGE.


Alright, don't judge. DON'T JUDGE.

I actually can't stand incest, but for some reason, I can't see Jacen and Anakin as brothers, really. I mean, the title's used, but... Anyway. I am really tired, and this might be the after effect of feeling betrayed because of Anakin's death (my favorite character) and Jacen's conversion and death (second favorite character). I swear, if Jag dies too...

Anyway. I like this pairing. Especially on so little sleep.

WARNING: JACEN/ANAKIN; INCEST; ANGST

Sorry...

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Star Wars. (LucasArts needs to look at its continuancy though. Anyone read the Republic Commando series? Traviss got kicked because "She messed with continuancy. LucasArts did that itself.)

**---**

**If We Never Meet Again**

Anakin sits, curled up in the corner of the living room, alone, in the dark. Jacen blinks in the darkness, using the Force alone to pinpoint his brother's position. Jacen steps carefully, so as not to get himself killed, and plops himself down next to his younger brother. He can feel his heart racing.

"Are you okay?"

"There's something wrong with me," Anakin says quietly. "There's something _wrong_ with me. I am disgusting and evil and _there is something wrong with me_."

Jacen knows what he's talking about, and he's not quite sure how to make his little brother feel better. Jacen's always been the one to tell him how wrong he is, Han's always been the one who is incredibly bitter about Chewbacca's death, and Anakin himself finds that his innermost self is disgusting.

"I don't think so."

Anakin's head turns toward him, blue eyes listless, or, if anything, full of self loathing.

"I am horrible."

Jacen leans forward and Anakin leans back. Jacen breathes out, gently. His younger brother's eyes water pitifully.

"Don't, Jacen. Don't rub it in like that," Anakin's voice cracks. Jacen realizes it's his own fault that Anakin's voice breaks. It had been his fault for pushing Anakin away when he confessed and that was an awful thing to do, because, really, he'd just been scared.

Jacen leans forward a little more, and Anakin moves until he has pressed himself against the wall.

Jacen contemplates the feeling sitting in his chest, the feeling of losing Anakin. He is sure he's never felt anything so oppressive, and he is sure he would die if Anakin was gone because of something so stupid as Jacen being a baby. (He really loved Anakin. He did, he did. He didn't mean to kick his brother out of the room.)

'Forgive me,' Jacen thinks, hard. 'Forgive me.' He is not talking to the Force, and he is not talking to Jaina's angry face (because, come morning, she will be sure to know). He is talking to Anakin. But Anakin has shut him out.

"If we never meet again," Jacen whispers, "if one day, suddenly, you're gone..." Jacen swallows and then moves the final distance.

It really isn't so bad, kissing his little brother. It fact, his heart is beating deliciously in his throat and his fingers are trembling nervously and the butterflies won't stop. It is a marvelous feeling.

Anakin pulls back, searching Jacen's face, and searching with the Force.

Jacen smiles, slightly. Pressing his forehead to his brother's, he murmurs, "I'll never be the same if we never meet again."

Anakin wraps his arms tightly around Jacen. (He really had been stupid for rejecting Anakin, simply because of his confession. He loved his younger brother just as Anakin loved him, and he felt bad about it, because it wasn't the love he was supposed to have, but he didn't regret it, not at all.)

_Don'teverletmego._

Jacen is sure he was not meant to feel that thought through the Force. But he holds that thought close to his heart.

(Anakin is not disgusting. Anakin is Anakin. And sometimes, things happen.)

"You're not disgusting." Jacen says, after awhile, remembering Anakin's sadness that isn't quite gone.

But Anakin is already asleep.

Jacen figures their parents won't find it weird if they share Jacen's bed fully clothed. In fact, Jacen will be seen as the concerned older brother. So Jacen picks up Anakin, who really is much lighter than he should be, and takes him upstairs.

Jacen and Anakin's limbs end up twisted together during the night, but it is the comfortable twist, an embrace, and they sleep peacefully.


End file.
